Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Riffer Guy Part 3: Uncanny Valley for Tits

Well I was finishing Takio on finishing the Case File and I realized something.....

So I decided it was time to go into the pictures file and do eight more Gamer Chick comics. Why eight? Well because there is a Christmas Special and I'll need to do that in one go. Also it might be connected to having just done a college course all about comic books and for it reading works such as Watchmen and Saga, I'm serious volume one has been fantastic and it is on going so pick it up if you can, my hope for comics in general started to rise. I needed to dash that quickly. So for now enjoy.

Ever here teenagers talk and wish they could all get kicked in the face by a mule? Well that is reading this comic. So it seems the artist is going to do the hair over the eyes thing and it is annoying as ever. Well that and half the time it seems the eyes are just lines laid at the vague area they would be normally and heck in you can't even see one of the lines that well in the second panel for it merges with the line for her hair. Also why have the visible ears shouldn't her hair cover that too?

Another thing I'm starting to notice is that uh.... Koromon Hat Woman is supposed to play the straight man but having that Koromon on makes no sense in that context. I mean does it protect from the aliens mind controlling rays or something?

Also once again the comic is terribly unfunny. I mean first if the idea is praying to the gaming gods why would she be facing the TV? I mean wouldn't it be better to have like old game consoles set up on a pentagram and make it look like some form of demonic ritual is going to take place. You know put in some effort over just having a smoking sombrero next to it. Also couldn't the prayer itself be for something with more comedic value? Just good games and food doesn't make a joke. I think this was before Duke Nukem Forever, quality of the game being ignored for now, came out you could wish for that. Heck you could modernize it and make the prayer for Versus XIII or whatever it is called now to release and not suck. So with that on to the next one.

So yeah and unfunny joke about playing a violent game to unwind. So few questions. Why does what is supposed to be the controller look like a black rubber ball? Why does what she is sitting on make it look like her feet have become giant? Why has the length, shade, and placement of her hair completely different? Why does the other chick have a strand of hair drawn in so badly it looks like it is running from her nose? Why does the GTA disk look like a wild card in Uno? Why didn't the artist remember to clean up the lines for her fucking teeth so there isn't spikes jabbing into the characters eye? Why the fuck did she spell Vice City as fucking Bice City? Not like she is going to fucking sell this or anything so why the fuck does it have an alternate title.

Also you know it be great to see just what at work is so bad to make her act like this. Once again you need context. So I feel nothing for this annoyance of a character.

Okay so first I have a question. Am I the only person that has had a positive shopping experience at a Gamestop? No seriously the people there are nice, it has an ok selection, and heck I've gotten some good deals out of trades I've done. I mean yeah there are issues with the pricing at times and the two talking heads they have to play on the screen hanged up can be annoying but still it isn't like walking into a satanic cult or anything. Also why does that one fucker work there? No seriously who the fuck hasn't hired that guy for sexual harassment? Also moron could talk to another employee. Unless our "hero" is such an annoying ball of cliché that the regular employees actually refuse to deal with her.

By the way. A blank fucking scroll colored in with what looks like black fucking marker tells us nothing! I mean does she want fucking nothing for Christmas!

Yes we know she wants one. Also can the employees even buy stuff on shift? Why would he just give it to her? Why the fuck doesn't she just go to another store? Why does his legs look like a deformed lump of playdough? Why the fuck can't you even have it so his foot properly attaches to his leg you idiot! Seriously do you know what human legs look like at all?! That and hell in the second panel it doesn't even look like she has a wrist.

So fucking is involved in the date. How obvious. Also fuck your bullshit anime eyes. Finally....

Just go to a different fucking store or Wallmart you stupid fucker! You do not have to agree and I hope the next strip is just you going somewhere else or I will have lost all caring for your dumbass self insert!


Also on the art don't add text faces to dialogue it makes you look like you have a third graders grasp of writing and why does she have a maggot burrowing into the top of her ear in the last panel? That and the way she draws her chest is starting to look like...

I mean I get it is a shot from the side but still something just looks off about it. Add on top of that the usually weirdness when drawing her chest reading this comic is like walking into the uncanny valley for tits.

Looking at how empty the theater is they must have been the two people that actually saw Basic Instinct 2.

Well ok that chest issue was fixed. Now she just has no arms, half her hair gone, and the guy has giant shovel heads for hands now.

Also I kind of feel sorry for the guy. I mean yeah he is a bit of a creep but at the same time the object of his affection is an unlikable fusion of yaoi fangirl and early 2000's female nerd stereotypes. Though based on how awful they both are it must be destined by the red string of fate. Ok there is only one left so let's get it over with.

"Yes I went on a date with him because I'm have so few braincells left that I didn't know what a Wallmart is and even though I couldn't even write down what you wanted because I spilled ink on the paper you better feel appreciative of my sacrifice!"

Yeah so I haven't even chuckled so far. Which honestly I'm starting too think I should create a grade lower than F like G just to express my distaste with this comic. Still yelling at it and venting is a good stress relieve so keep an eye out for more.

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