Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Don't Hold Me Closer Cloaked Dancer Update

Hello for the about three people that read my blog Don't Hold Me Closer Cloaked Dancer (Part 9) will be coming out late tonight or sometime tomorrow morning. It is going to be a triple chapter part for I think updates are going to slow because I picked up my pre order of Kindom Hearts 3D today and want to play through it to see if there are any jokes I can make using new knowledge of cannon. So until then.

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Don't Hold Me Closer Cloaked Dancer (Part 8)

((Hey everyonneeee!! Gabe here, welllll I know that a lot of you have probably already read Chapter nine...wellllll...I'm sorry but that was actually chapter 10. ;;;;; GOMMEENNNN!! I'm soooo sorry!! 3;;; I accidentally got them mixed up! D:))/b

Johnel: That was just painful to read. Also I still doubt your claims of identity.

Axel picked Zexion up with ease, turning her in every direction thought possible to examine her, then his eyes finally settled on Zexion's flat belly.

Johnel: You know got to check your synthetics women for cracks now and then.

Zexion blinked, "Oh...I'm sorry...did you not want me to perform?"she frowned softly.

Axel blinked and snapped back into reality, "No no! I love your performances...it's just-" he paused and rubbed the back of his head, "I don't want you to hurt the baby...going upside down like that...I was just worried for him...or her." he lightly rubbed Zexion's belly and smiled softly.

Johnel: Of course that makes sense. No wait it doesn’t.

"I...how'd you know!?" Zexion gasped.

Axel chuckled, "I'm your lover. A lover has got to know."

Johnel: *As Axel* Because fuck you that’s why.

The small dancer rose an eyebrow and put her hand on her hips, "I don't believe that, it's not scientifically possible for you to just 'know' at this early in my pregnancy," she protested, crossing her arms.

Johnel: Well if you were a man the pregnancy itself would be impossible but seeing as you are a woman we will just leave it at that.

Axel laughed and ruffled her hair, "Okay okay! Me and Xigbar heard you talking to Demyx about pregnancy tests. Hehe...Xigbar freaked out, thinking he got Demyx pregnant..."

Johnel: Ha ha silly Xigbar thinking you could get a man pregnant.

"Ohh! You are such dorks!" Zexion pouted, flicking Axel in the forehead. Axel gave a small chuckle in surprise.

"So...is he mine?" was Axel's next question.

Johnel:*As Zexion* No it’s Kefka’s.

Zexion smiled and nodded, "I'm positive, because I knew I was pregnant before the first time I had sex with Lexaeus. It's fine."

Johnel: Wait I thought you had avoided that. Also glad to see you can still walk.

"You know, I'd be his father to the best of my abilities...even if it doesn't end up being mine," the red head giggled, poking Zexion in the belly once again.

Johnel: Mind that is abilities to be a father are very lacking.

Zexion squeaked and smiled, leaning up to kiss Axel gingerly. "I love you so much!" She said.

Johnel: You notice that both love interests are always taller in this scenario.

Axel nodded in agreement and held Zexion's hands, pulling her into his lap as he sat in one of the club's chairs. "You're so beautiful," he whispered into the girl’s mauve coloured hair. "I love you so much, and you are my beautiful sparkling diamond," he cooed, caressing Zexion's back.

Johnel: Mauve really? Also that diamond line is so cliché it was old before the internet.

Zexion gave a small laugh, "And you are my big red-headed lion,"s he purred, gently pulling one of Axel's spikes.

Johnel: Shut up we don’t need to be dragging the fur into this I’ve already got Sonic fics lined up and would like to wait until then to deal with it.

Also I cut out another paragraph of kissing but you didn’t miss much.

The mauve-haired girl pulled away and laughed, holding her sides as he rubbed tears from his eyes as he doubled over, his usually small voice sounding rather loud and attention gathering. Axel watched her and raised an inquisitive eyebrow.

Johnel: Well it seems she finally just snapped.

"Sorry...I'm...hehe, I'm sorry!" Zexion laughed. "You were...you were g-growling!" she snorted, flinging her head back as she went into another fit of laughter. "Y-You sounded like a dog...growling! Pft...ahahahaha!" she giggled.

Johnel: Really I thought he was a lion?

Axel watched him and frowned, "You have a weird sense of humor," he muttered.

"Grrr," Zexion said, snapping at Axel like a playful puppy. "Grrrowl!" she snorted.

Johnel: Honestly I’m starting to think the creator is just going through a mental break down at this point.

Axel watched him and a smile played on his lip. He let out a small laugh, "You are so weird," he said.

Johnel: Honestly weird is an understatement.

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Sora's Lo...Assuming Direct Control (Part 1)

Johnel: Just thought I’d take a break from the jolly old whore house and go over a couple of chapters in a fan fiction I’d attempted to riff on a long time ago. The story is called Sora’s love life by Not Your Original Girl on fanfiction.net.

Hello Im doing a fanfic that i think alot of people out there(You) Will like..Leave comments(:

Johnel: I’m pretty sure I won’t like it at all.

I dont own kingdom hearts or any of the characters...except for Hope. I made her up..but she's gonna be in the story later on..Enjoy! This is the part where Sora and Kairi confess the most amazing thing..Yay!

Johnel: Well now I’m worried about the mental age of the author but let’s ignore that and see what the actually fic is like.


The breeze was light and the sun was shinning and reflecting off of the water as the waves crashed and hit the shore. It was a perfect day at Destiny's Island and Sora and Kairi were enjoying it as they sat on a tree with Paopu Fruites at the end.

Johnel: Already the grammar is causing me physical pain.

Sora looked at Kairi, The beautifulest thing he had ever seen. The wind was blowing her hair and the sun made her eyes sparkle, and it made her skin look smooth. When Sora looked back at the endless water Kairi looked at Sora. She loved his messy hair. She loved the way his eyes matched the color of the water. She loved his tan colored skin it went good with his black, yellow, and red outfit. Kairi looked back at the sea. It was the perfect time for Sora or Kairi to confess their feelings for eachother.

Johnel: You know if I didn’t know what happens in this fic I’d almost be hopeful that the author would stick closer to cannon.

"Sora.." Kairi said. She pushed back her hair and she put it behind her ears. She looked at Sora. His ocean-like-eyes were watching her every move. And she liked that.

Johnel: Well I can tell this fic won’t overdose on character descriptions yes in deed.

"Whats up Kairi?" Sora said. He loved the way Kairi pushed her hair back. To him it looked like a father seeing his baby daughter for the first time.

Johnel: Author look at that last sentence and tell me why it was a good idea.

"Since the first time i met you..i liked you, and now..i love you." Kairi said. Her hair fell infront of her face and she let it. She thought it was hide the fact that she was blushing. Sora was shocked. Angels sang songs in his head and he heard Kairi say that over and over. Sora smiled he felt the same way and he was gonna let her know.

Johnel: Then get on with it.

"Kairi..i love you too." Sora said as he put her hair behind her ears. Kairi looked at Sora. He looked like he had seen a godess.

Johnel: I think I should start playing fanfic bingo for with the comparison to deity line I’d almost have a winning card.

 And Kairi looked like she had seen a god. Sora put his hand on Kairi's cheek and she closed her eyes..Sora felt like she was bringing him closer..and closer to her lips, but she was. Slowly his face was going to hers. Sora breathed in deeply when his lips were about to touch hers.

Johnel: zzzz…zzzzz…Huh oh they still going I was just dozing off for a second there.

 They were kissing for the first time. Sora loved it as much as Kairi did. They knew they would be a perfect couple. But what they didnt know was that Riku was watching from behind a tree.

Johnel: O hai Riku.

 He wasnt shocked at all. He knew they would end up together from the begining. Riku's long silver hair was in his face and his blind flod was over his eyes. His black coat was getting dusky at the end because of the sand. But it wasnt notice able.

Johnel: Wait when does this take place again?

 Sora and Kairi pulled away. Kairi bit her bottom lip and her white teeth showed. Sora licked his lip and he closed his eyes. He saw their kiss over and over again in his head. He couldnt stop seeing it. He loved it..he loved her. She loved it too..and she loved him. They were so happy.

Johnel: You know everyone puts all this crap into first kisses and all that but from experience I don’t see the point.

 They looked back at the endless water as the sun touched the water. The sky started turning red. Sora and Kairi held hands and Riku left. Sora and Kairi just watched the sunset. There were no words from both of them and night fell.

Johnel: Yet the fic just keeps gong.

"Sora..can you walk me home please..im getting cold." Kairi said. Sora looked over at Kairi. At night her hair was calm, and her eyes looked dark but sparkly at the same time. Her skin looked pale but pleasant.

Johnel: We know what she looks like stop telling us!

"Sure Kairi." Sora said. He jumped off the tree. His hair was flowing with everymove he made, and his closed were loose. His eyes stood out in the darkness of the night and his skin looked darker than normal. His black fingerless gloves grabbed Kairi's waist as he helped her off. When she jummped off her chest was close to Sora's. It almost looked like he was hugging her. Sora kissed Kairi and he pulled away. He looked in her eyes. He could get lost in them and Kairi could drown in his. Kairi moved closer to Sora and they kissed again.

Johnel: At this rate the hormones and flowery dialogue will keep them from getting anything done.

 Then they started walking to her house. When they reached the yard Kairi looked at Sora.

"Well goodnight." Kairi said.

"Goodnight Kairi..never forget..i love you." Sora said.

Johnel: Well with Sora’s track record everyone will forget who he is for another year in say a weeks time.

“I promise you i will never forget if you dont ever forget i love you." Kairi said.

"Okay i promise i wont." Sora said as he stuck out his pinky.

Johnel: This is so cheesy I think it might make a good topping for my pizza.

"I promise too." Kairi said as she intertwined her pinky with his. Sora pulled her in to kiss her for the last time of the day. Sora watched Kairi walk inside her house. When she was inside he started to walk. But he stoped when he heard her scream.

Johnel: *As Kairi* Ah a Spider!

 Sora ran in and saw her mom dead on the floor.

Johnel: I’m going to guess adopted mother but I’m not exactly sure the author gets the whole from another world we know nothing of the parents thing.

 Sora ran up to Kairi's room and they keyblade appeared in his hands when he opened the door. Kairi ran to Sora and hugged him, she was crying. Sora looked at Kairi then he looked back at the man in the room he had a sword in his hand. Sora ran to the man and the guy tried to stab Sora. He missed and Sora stabbed the man.

Johnel: With the flat tip of the Keyblade he stabbed a man? Okay I’d question it more but Sora has cut through skyscrapers with that thing so I won’t doubt he found a way.

 He fell to his knees and he fell face forward on the floor. Sora turned around and Kairi ran in his arms. They walked down the stairs to the living room. Sora picked up the dead girl and he placed her on the purple sofa.

Johnel: Okay girl is a bad choice of words to describe someone’s mother it just doesn’t fit.

Her heart came out and she dissappeard.

Johnel: Wait I thought she was stabbed so why is she pulling a Jedi disappearing corpse on us?

 Kairi buried her face in Sora's chest and she began to cry. Sora couldnt take it. Each tear was like a stabing to his heart. Sora kissed Kairi and they walked to Sora's house. When they walked in Sora found his mom dead too.

Johnel: Well hey we already have body count.

"That monster came here too and killed her.." Sora said.

Johnel: Or one case could have been a homeless man high on speed for this fic seems to not really go anywhere with this later.

 Tears filled his eyes. Then just like Kairi's mom she fadded away. Sora and Kairi walked to Sora's room and they layed on the bed. Kairi cried herself to sleep. When she was asleep Sora looked around and made sure no one was in the room. When he finished checking his room he checked the whole house. He heard a little crack but it was just his dog Max.

Johnel: Oh god the author is making reference to Disney no one is safe.

When Sora was done he walked to his room and layed next to Kairi. She looked like an angel sleeping. Sora instently fell asleep. But what no one else understands is how painful it is sleeping with a broken heart.

Johnel: Yes for no one else has ever lost a love one or more than one in a single night.


That was the end of the first chapter i hope you like it..sorry about the sad ending. I just wanted it to be like Sora and Kairi been through alot together..even though you guys know they have(Because of all the kingdom hearts games.)

Johnel: So did you just admit those murders were pointless?

 So let me know whatcha think. Was it sad? No! Was it cool? No! was it romantic? No! Did you like it? No! Hate it? Yes! Let me know what you think. Every time you leave a review you leave a place in my heart for you(:

Johnel: I’m praying to Arceus then that every line of snark hurts you in some way.

Hey! its chapter two of this fanfic. I cant wait for you to read it. I dont own kingdom hearts or any of the characters except for Hope. Speaking of her this is the part were Sora meets her and Sora gets his heart broken. Hope ya like it!

Johnel: Watch out for Sues.


The next morning Sora woke up but Kairi wasnt there. "Kairi?" Sora yelled as he looked around his room and he ran out.

"Goodmorning Sora" Kairi said. Sora ran up to her and he hugged her

"Kairi I though you were..." Sora couldnt finish it because just saying it was too painful for him.

Johnel: How exactly do you “though” something?

"Im fine Sora..i love you." Kairi said as she gently kissed his soft lips.

"I love you too Kairi." Sora said as he kissed her forehead.

Johnel: You know it might be just me or the words I love you are being used to the point of all meaning being lost.

"Do you want breakfast?" Kairi asked with a giggle.

Johnel: *as Kairi* For it isn’t like our parents have been murdered and we should be going to the proper authorities or emotional scarred in any way tee-hee.

"Sure." Sora said. After a few min. Kairi walked back with a plate of cooked eggs.

"Thank you Kairi." Sora said. Kairi smiled and she sat in his lap. He took a bite of the eggs and he gave the other to Kairi.

Johnel: Boring.

"Well im gonna go take a quick shower." Kairi said as she kissed Sora's cheek. She put her hair into a messy ponytale then she skipped to the bathroom. Sora watched as the love of his life left. He heard the water go on and he finished the eggs. Then he heard the water go off and a few seconds later Kairi came

Johnel: A few second shower really must be some kind of record. Also why put your hair up if you are just going to hop in the shower right afterwards?

back out with her beautiful hair done, her amazing pink clothes on, and her pale skin was soft. Sora smiled the he walked to the bathroom. When the water was off Kairi walked to the bathroom. Sora was putting gel in his hair. He stopped and smiled at Kairi.

Johnel:*Singing* Boring this is so boring can something please just blow up ohhhh.

"Sora can we go out and do something tonight?" Kairi asked as Sora finished putting on the gel.

"Sure Kairi." Sora said with a smile. The day went by fast fir Sora and Kairi because they had something to look forward too.

Johnel: Bow chika wow wow… sorry that was just terrible.

 So that night Sora and Kairi were holding hands as they walked to the island. Sora and Kairi passed a beautiful girl.

 Her black hair was as long as Kairi's but her bangs were across her whole forehead and they were alittle above her eye brows, her eyes sparkled all the time, her smile was unique, and she was about as tall as Kairi. She was wearing a black t-shirt that made her smooth, soft, and lightly tanned arms show, with black skinny jeans and black vans.

Johnel: And not a single fuck was given.

She had black fingerless gloves like Sora's and his eyes were glued to her. Then Sora reminded himself. *Youre here with your girlfriend..youre here with Kairi.* Sora snapped out of it and they continued to walk.

Johnel: Yes Sora resist the evil Sue’s attempts at indoctrination and stay on the path of cannon.

 They finaly reached they beach. It was dark, the waves crashed alittle bit hard harder, and the full.

Johnel: The full toaster? The full bag of jelly beans? The Full House reunion special? The full of shit author?

 Sora and Kairi kissed before they sat down on the cold and rough sand. When they did sit, they were yanked up by mysterious people. "Kairi!" Sora yelled.

Johnel: *As Sora* Run it’s the Elite Beat Agents!

 She screamed in pain because the people were beating her up while Sora was watching, but he couldnt do anything because two strong guys were holding him back.

Johnel: Um if I may I’d like to interject. Sora in the first game beat the shit out of what was essential Satan so author you are full of bullshit!

Tears started to form in Sora's eyes. Kairi was screaming..then she stopped..she was dead. A guy went up to Sora and he punched him then they all left. Sora fell to his knees because he was hurt.

Johnel: A Big Lipped Alligator Murder!

"Kairi!" Sora yelled. He started to crawl to the dead girl. He was crying.

"Help!" That beautiful girl he saw was begin chased by heartless. She tripped and the heartless were gonna get her.

Johnel: No Sora fight the indoctrination none of this is real you can resist.

"Some help! Please! Ahh!" She was screaming. She closed her eyes and thought the worst..she thought she was gonna die. Just then she heard a BOOM! She opened her eyes and saw a boy holding a key like weapon in his hand and he fell to his knees.

Johnel: Or you can dive right in use your powers only for the Sue and fall for it like any idiot who thought the ME3 endings were good.

"Oh no!" She said as she ran to him and she fell to her knees.

"Are you okay?" The girl asked. He didnt answer. She began to touch his chest were his heart would be.

Jonel: That isn’t how you check for a pulse dumbass.

"You've been through alot havent you? You are heartbroken, your in pain, and anger and rage is begining to fill your heart..in other words your giving into darkness..please dont let it control you."

Johnel: Oh I’m mistaken it is just another ass pull Sue power.

When she was finished Sora opened his eyes. He saw big brown eyes infront of his. He blinked a few times to see right..when he did he saw the beauty that was more beautiful than Kairi infront of him.

Johnel: Glad to see you have your priorities straight kid.

 Her eyes were worrried, her body was over his, her hair fell towards her face and one hand was on his cheek. The glove was warm so his cheek was getting warm. When she saw Sora's eyes open a smile flew across her face and her eyes sparkled with joy. Sora was stareing into the beautiful girl's eyes. Then he rememberd Kairi. He looked around and he saw her. He tried to get up but he was too hurt.

Johnel: Once again he fought Satan yet some thugs hurt him this badly.

"That girl over there?" The girl asked. Her voice was beautiful and calm.

Johnel: Yes go on with how beautiful the Sue is why I bet she doesn’t even defecate and instead rainbows come out her anus.

"Yeah." Sora answered and a smile was on her face.

"Why are you smiling?" Sora asked confused.

Johnel: Because she is Harbinger in disguise and wants to use your Keyblade to move the cycle of harvesting into new galaxies of course.

"Because i like your voice." She said. Sora smiled

"Thanks." Sora answered.

"Your welcome..so right the girl." She helped Sora up. Her arm was around his waist and his arm was around her sholder. She walked him to Kairi and tears formed in his eyes. He fell to his knees.

"Kairi.." Sora said.

Johnel:*As Sora* I will completely forget your existence by the next chapter and instead bed this Sue who is actually a Reaper hallucination.

"Was this girl your girlfriend?" She asked and Sora nodded.

"Oh my god..im so sorry." She said. She bent down to Sora.

"Im Hope." She said. Sora looked at her.

Johnel: Unoriginal name is unoriginal.

"Im Sora." He said. Hope smiled.

"Lovely name..Sora." Sora smiled alittle.

"Thanks. He said. Hope helped Sora up and she walked him to his house. Sora looked at Hope. Her hair was flowing with ever step she took, her eyes were filled with pain because she saw Sora like that. And there was no smile on her face. When they got to Sora's house Hope gently layed Sora on his bed. She looked at him and he looked at her. A smile was on her face.

Johnel: *As the Sue I mean Harbinger* This hurts you.

"Thanks Hope..youre a good friend." Sora said.

Johnel: Well he is a lost cause.

"Sora..how am i already your friend we just met right now." Hope said with a smile.

"Well a friend wouldnt have helped me here." Sora said with a smile.

"Yeah..i guess...well Sora do you want me to come in the morning and check on you or what?" Hope asked.

"Well why dont you just sleep here tonight." Sora asked.

"Oh..umm okay..but im sleeping on the floor. And Sora dont get any ideas." Hope said with a smile. Sora chuckled.

Johnel: Yes for that is exactly what I would do after my girlfriend die. Have sex with a random female less than twenty minutes later.

"Dont worry Hope im not a pervert. " He said. Hope smiled and her eyes sparkled. They were really noticable. Sora smiled about that and Hope layed on the floor.

"Goodnight Sora." Hope said with her eyes closed.

"Goodnight Hope." Sora said as he watch her. She fell asleep and she looked so peaceful. Sora didnt understand it. He just lost the love of his life but he's begining to be interested in her.

Johnel: Well isn’t that just grand you moron.


That was the end of this chapter. I hope ya like it! Let me know whatcha think about it. I love ya guys and have a good day/night(:

Johnel: Burn the witch!

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Don't Hold Me Closer Cloaked Dancer (Part 7)

Zexion re-entered the club with Demyx. She sighed and plopped into a maroon-brown chair; she was soon bombarded by men asking her questions such as:

Johnel:*As random customer* Why are you the only women that works here?

"Where have you been!?"


"How could you leave me!?"

Johnel: Well aren’t you a bit self-centered Mr. Customer.

They didn't dare touch Zexion, however, still fearful of Saix who was watching from a fairly good distance; a glare occupying his face.

Johnel: Honestly you start to wonder why they still go there with the fear of ninja attacks.

"Come on! One more dance for old times sake?" a customer begged, he was soon joined by several other men who were starting somewhat of a chant.

Johnel: Don’t mind me by asking but why would they want just a dance? I mean this is a whore house you can dream a little bigger.

 "Yeah! Before you leave us again!?" another customer yelled through the chants.

"Eh..." Zexion was stupefied. She loved all the attention and how they urged her on, but she couldn't, not after she promised Lexaeus. She already broke one promise by returning to the club; she couldn't break another one. "...I can't," she explained sheepishly.

Johnel: *As Fem!Zexion* At least until the author creates some added drama and has a couple more paragraphs of padding.

"Your replacement is getting all the attention..." Demyx whispered after then men had given up.

"R...Replace...replaceme...nt...?" Zexion seemed to struggle getting the word out. Could she have actually been replaced? Zexion gave Demyx a long hard stare, her eyes large in disbelief. No one and she meant NO ONE could steal his job as number one!

Johnel: Yes for number one cock sucker in the tri-state area is such prestigious position. Also yes you can get replaced you don’t work there anymore remember dumbo?

Demyx frowned, "Yeah..." he said. "Some kid named Mar something or the other... his parents kicked him out so he lives here now, and works of course. And he's as popular as you were, before you started to ditch us. But he's only so popular because he let's the customers touch him-" Demyx leaned in some. "-/wherever/ they want! It's true!" he nodded.

Johnel: No shit Sherlock it’s a whore house!

Zexion snorted and narrowed her eyes at Marluxia.

Johnel: Well I was starting to wonder where he was it is the kind of fic his character gets dragged into.

"That's the /only/ reason he's as popular as I was! But I have a little more-- no! Wayyy more class than that! Right Axel?" she growled, snapping her fingers angrily. She closed her eyes and stood proudly, waiting for her forbidden lover's response, but it never seemed to come.

Johnel: I guess Axel used the pregnancy distraction to escape the fic.

Demyx looked around then back at Zexion who was still waiting for an answer from Axel. Zexion's eyes shot open and averted towards Marluxia's station. Not only was Axel there, but Xigbar as well as literally the rest of the customers were there too. The other dancers were just as confused as Zexion was; they all watched angrily. When Zexion got all of the attention it was alright, but something about Marluxia made everyone of the dancers angry.

Johnel: That something was shit writing.

"Oh no he di'n't!" Demyx growled, spotting Xigbar gawking at Marluxia.

Johnel: Demyx you are as white as a Reshiram so shut up.

The dancers all ran to Zexion and pulled at her, "Zexion! Do Something!" they cried, grouping up around her and pulling her clothes.

"I'm sorry you guys, but I promised Lexaeus..." Zexion apologized sadly.

"You mean your fiancee that you're cheating on with Axel? The same fiancee that doesn't know you're pregnant with someone else? The /very same/ fiancee that-"

Johnel: See even Demyx could see the bullshit.

"That's enough!" Zexion yelled, cutting Demyx off mid sentence. "I-I'll...do it, okay?" she sighed.

"Yay!" Every dancer was dancing around happily, and acting a bit giddy. They were happy to see one of Zexion's awe inducing performances.

Johnel: Why do I feel this instead will be boring as all hell.

Demyx smiled and ran to his room, getting his sitar.

Johnel: He then summoned water clones to murder everyone for it was clearly too late for them.

 He strummed and a slow song began to fill the air, perfect for setting the mood. The yells and begs for attention the men were giving to Marluxia ceased and everyone stopped to look at Demyx. He climbed onto the large stage with some difficulty and got the microphone, firmly grasping it in pale hands. He was a bit sweaty, and stage-shy with everyone watching him.

Johnel: He has stage fright…. Is the author not understanding what these characters do for a living?

A loud sound emitted from the two large amplifiers when Demyx dropped the microphone and it rolled. He squeaked and covered his ears, bending over to pick up the fallen mic. "S-sorry!" he squealed. The crowd gave some irritated boos at the loud static sound. Demyx sniffed and felt like he was going to cry from embarrassment, but some encouraging words from his friend back stage urged him on.

Johnel: Honestly how does this place stay in business.

"G-Gentlemen a-and d-dancers. Please...ahem p-please give your w-warmest greetings to...Z-Zexion..th...the cloaked scheme-mer...” he gave a bubbly smile and decided it wasn't that scary when the men blinked and started to cheer. He ran off of the stage and started the music.

Johnel: *Singing* Don’t hold me closer cloaked dancer. Go lay your feet down on the highway. Get your legs crushed by the moving metal. You’ll never dance another day.

 A single beam of light shined down at the pole on the stage, and the short beauty stepped forward from behind the curtains.

Johnel: Then was promptly fainted never dancing a bit.

Zexion had changed into a maid's outfit. It was a dark purple with light purple frills and bows. It was short and hardly covered the little purple panties hidden underneath. She hugged the pole tenderly and waltzed around it in a slow suspenseful fashion. The girl bent over and licked her fingers seductively , her pointer finger pulled out and traced her cherry pink lips and went down to her collar bone and chest. Slender fingers explored his own body, eliciting moans from the horny old men.

Johnel: Of course this was more moans of irritation for this show was incredibly boring.

The small girl wrapped a single leg and a single arm around the pole and she slowly started to grind against it, making the most adorable face she could. She managed himself upside down and wrapped both legs around the pole, purposely letting her dress (which was more of a shirt than anything) fall to reveal her porcelain thighs and tightening panties.

Johnel: He also has a liver of copper. Also this is very bland and not at all sexy.

When she looked over she saw her redheaded lover. She gave a sensual smile, which only received a worried frown. Zexion got down from her upside down position and danced around the pole some more. She stopped and picked up the microphone, "Thank you everyone!" she giggled, receiving saddened voices that didn't want him to stop. "Please enjoy our other talented dancers!" she smiled brightly. She watched happily as the customers visited the many other stations then she slowly made her way towards Axel.

Johnel: *As a random customer* You suck!

"Are you alright?" he asked worriedly.

Johnel: Eh I’ve got nothing else. Play me off Burlesque!

Sunday, July 8, 2012

Don't Hold Me Closer Cloaked Dancer (Part 6)

Johnel: Alright I’m just going to do Chapters 6 and 7 at the same time so let’s do this.

Zexion came out of the bathroom. He rubbed his stomach and looked at Lexaeus, "I'll be sleeping in one of the guest rooms until I get better. I don't want you to get sick," he said softly.

Lexaeus nodded, "I understand," he said, kissing Zexion's forehead. "Now go and get ready for bed, I'll have Cloud bring you some tea," he smiled softly. Zexion nodded and scurried off. He sighed and hopped into his pajamas then layed in bed. He turned down the lights then took out his stuffed teddy that Vexen had given him.

Johnel: Okay he sleeps with a teddy bear at his age… actually I have no idea how old he is supposed to be I’ll have to look this up later.

Thankfully it didn't bother Lexaeus for him to still keep it, he convinced Lexaeus Vexen was a father figure of sorts.

Johnel: Unfortunately Birth By Sleep makes this weirder in context.

 He snuggled the teddy, "I love you Vexy," he sniffed softly.

Johnel: Also use of Vexy causes baby sparrows to be lit on fire so just warning fan fiction writers now.

 Once again while Zexion was absorbed in his own thoughts he didn't hear a pebble as it hit his window. After the annoying sound of tapping filtered through his head he sat up and walked to his window.

Johnel: The pebble at the window cliché really author?

"God damnit what do you wa-" Zexion stopped dead in his tracks when he saw the familiar ginger hair and soft, yet bright emerald eyes. He rubbed his eyes and turned. Just a hallucination!

Johnel: Well with his line of work drugs are something that most likely get passed around.

 he yelled in his head. When you turn around...it will be gone.And so he turned, but unfortunately then grinning man was still waving like an idiot.

Johnel: Well at least the idiot part is right.

"Yo Zexy! Why'd you leave me?" the ginger yelled up. "I waited for WEEKS for you to come back! And finally someone told me you were gone!"

Johnel: So Zexion didn’t tell him? Also three baby seals.

"Shh!" Zexion screamed through gritted teeth. He looked around. "Hold on! I'll come down!" he whispered quite loudly. Looking around, Zexion tried to find something to lower himself down. He looked in a large trunk and found an escape ladder in case of fires. He climbed down and jumped into Axel's arms, hugging him and kissing him all over.

Johnel: Convenient ladders and more corny actions it is just my lucky day.

"You left me!" Zexion said finally. "You left and then I had to go...with my...new husband..." he said, looking down sadly.

Johnel: It isn’t like you work at a whorehouse and he might have a job or something.

"You're married...already!?" Axel asked. "B-but...it hasn't even been that long!" he gasped.

Johnel: Well those crazy Vegas weddings you know.

Zexion shook his head, "No, not married yet...a few more months though," he said. "I...I really love you though...he's not..as passionate as you are," he whispered, lightly kissing the red head's temple. Axel picked him up bridal style and nuzzled him happily.

Johnel: How’d he reach Axel’s temple?

"I love you too," he whispered. "I love you so much I can't stand it.

Johnel: Gag me with a chakram this is bad.  

Zexion giggled softly and wrapped his arms around Axel's neck, pulling him into a deep and loving kiss. They rolled their tongues together, loving every moment of the exchange.

Johnel: Until they both had their name written in the Death Note and died the end.

Axel slowly sat down then layed back and pulled Zexion on top of him. One of his hands slowly traveled up Zexion's tiny pajama shirt while the other worked it's way down his silky purple shorts. Zexion gasped slightly and his head went back as he let out a small moan.

Johnel: Ready shields the author might go through with the sex scene .

Axel contentedly nudged Zexion and nipped at his neck, "I love you," he iterated. He was so drawn into Zexion right now, he never wanted the moment to end. He felt somewhat depressed when he realized he was the one that had to stop the moment. He pulled his hands back and sat Zexion up. "Not here," he whispered softly against the boy's neck. Zexion moaned in discontent.

"Whhyyy?" Zexion's small voice groaned.

Johnel: Well from what I can tell you are on the cold ground in a backyard so maybe that would be a bit uncomfortable.

Axel stood up and held him close, rocking him like a child.

Johnel: That does not help this story’s case what so ever.

"We're still in public, hun," he whispered with a small laugh. He stroked Zexion's hair, "Let's go back with Demyx and the others, they said you haven't come to see them since you left for this stupid mansion..." he said, sounding a little upset. His emerald eyes met with Zexion's ocean blue ones then their lips met in another passionate kiss.

Johnel: Yes for if I was in that position I totally would like to go visit a whorehouse I worked at socially and not cut ties trying to forget it.

Zexion broke it and nodded, "Let's go...I miss them," he smiled.

Axel nodded and carried him off, nuzzling him every now and again.

Johnel: So he walked there carrying Zexion the whole way? He must be sore after that.


"Hello? Zexion, sir?" Cloud was tired of knocking on the boy's door so he simply barged in with the silver tray covered with cakes and tea.

Johnel: *As Cloud* I’ve brought cake and rape I mean cake and tea.

Cloud's sunglass covered eyes looked around, finding no trace of the boy. "Zexion?" he asked again. Blinking softly with a hint of worry in his crystal eyes, he ran to the bed setting the tray down. His eyes averted toward the window where the rope ladder hung.

Johnel: Well ZExion is an idiot.

He ran towards it and looked out, seeing a flick of Axel's bright red hair. He grinned and snickered softly.

"This is rich," he laughed.

Johnel: Also Chapter 7 starts now.

The night had been one of the best of Zexion's life. He got to see his old friends, meet some new regulars at the club and most of all he got to spend time with his Axel. His ginger headed emerald eyed flame thrower. Flame thrower was a new nickname Axel received because he was so great with handling fire.

Johnel: Oh come on at least get the nickname from the game right if you are going to do things like this.

"Soo...Demyx?" Zexion asked, looking at the handsome boy. Demyx looked over and nodded, signaling Zexion to go on with his talking. Zexion bit his lip and continued.

Johnel: For Zexion has no spine and requires permission for everything.

"Hey...bud...can we talk in private?" Zexion finished.

"I..uh...I suppose," Demyx said, already making his way to the corridor marked 'employees' only.

"I think I'm pregnant!" Zexion blurted out.

Johnel: No.

Demyx blinked, "Wha-...what?" he asked, eyes wide with surprise at the sudden outburst.

Johnel: No.

"No time for repeats! We have to get to the store...I'm scared Demyx! I'm so scared!" Zexion sniffed, hugging the other boy lightly.

Johnel: No. No. No.

Demyx grabbed his hand. "It's okay Zexy w-we'll get a test and it'll show you you aren't pregnant!" he said, running out of the corridor. "We'regoingtothemarketokaybye!" he managed to say in one breath. The others blinked in confusion at the boy's franticness, but waved to them and began to talk amongst themselves once more.

"Get twenty!" Zexion demanded. Demyx blinked in confusion. "Just do it! One of them has to be right!" he said. Demyx quickly obeyed and put a handful in the basket. They ran to the front desk and waited impatiently. They didn't care that everyone in the line as well as the cashier was giving them odd looks.

"Hurry hurry!" Demyx yelled.

"It's an emergency!" Zexion cried.

The cashier kept her same slow pace. "Wait, Demyx! Go get like..ten Monsters!" Zexion said, pointing to the back. Demyx nodded and scurried to the drinks, getting fifteen just in case.

Johnel: Yes drink energy drinks and not be pregnant.

"Will you boys be able to pay for this?" the woman asked, raising a thin eyebrow.

"Ugh! Yes! Just hurry!" Zexion yelled. Demyx set the drinks down and they both waited frantically again. "That'll be-" Zexion looked at the price, it was well over one hundred dollars. He didn't feel like getting out the change because he was in such a rush so he pulled out two hundred dollar bills and set them down. "Keep the change!" he yelled, grabbing the bags and running off.

Johnel: I don’t want to know where those bills have been.

 Demyx sprinted after him worriedly, starting to believe that Zexion actually /could/ be pregnant.

Johnel: I will repeat no.

They ran all the way back to the club and, ignoring the older men's greetings, ran to Demyx's old room. Demyx's room as the most comforting of all of the rooms. The walls were sea blue and the carpets were a sandy brown. It resembled the beach, the place Demyx had always dreamt of living near.

Johnel: Count how many fucks I give. Stumped the answer is none.

Zexion charged to the restroom with one of the tests. After about an excruciating hour Zexion had finished every test. Demyx layed them all out on the bed and they started to search through them. "Oh look!" Demyx said, picking one up. "This one has a frowny face! This one has a frowny face!" he giggled excitedly. Zexion took it, "Really!?" he gasped happily. Demyx nodded and handed it to him.

Johnel: Oh thank Arceus that it’s negative.

Zexion cried when he saw it, "That's a smiley face y-you idiot!" he sniffed, throwing it at him. Demyx looked at it again "...o-oh...s-sorry!" he gasped.

They both looked at all the rest, "They're all...positive..." Zexion said. "That means I'm pregnant! O-Oh...oh my god!" he cried, hugging Demyx.

Johnel: ………. Suffer Foolish Fools!

Also Zexion is now Veronica for she is not a man. She has a vagina, a clitoris, fallopian tubes, a cervix, and a mother fucking uterus! This is not a man! In fact from now on I will edit appropriately.

Demyx hugged him back, "Wait! Maybe-"

Zexion covered Demyx's mouth. "Don't give me any of that maybe shit..." she sniffed. "I can't take it right now..."

Demyx nodded and hugged him. "Is it...Lexaeus'?" he asked.

Johnel: No it is only going to be her twu wuv Axel.

"No...couldn't be...I haven't had sex with him yet. We did...almost once...but then I got sick..."she said softly.

Johnel: Great show of control there small tits.

Demyx nodded to show Zexion he understood. "Well...hmm...are you...gonna get rid of it?" he asked softly.

Johnel: Yes get rid of the horrible demon spawn so it may never walk the earth.

Zexion shook her head, "Dear god no! I could never kill someone as defenseless as that..." she whispered.

Johnel: Okay I’m not going to take a stance on the abortion issue but this isn’t a baby it is a demon spawn of fiction so just suck it out with a vacuum.

Demyx nodded again and held her close, "Well...I'll help you get through it! All of it!" he said.

Zexion sighed and looked up at Demyx, "Hey Dem...have you ever felt like someone is just using you for sex...because your cute and not because they love you?" she asked.

Johnel: For it isn’t like you work at a whore house or anything.

Demyx rose an eyebrow, "Zexion...look were we work," he laughed.

Johnel: Thank you Demyx for making my points for me.

"Oh...yeah..." Zexion laughed softly. She really believed Lexaeus didn't love her...only liked her because she was cute, but Axel saw beyond that.

Johnel: Sure dumbass sure he does.

 Zexion knew this because every time she looked in the red head's eyes the red head looked back with loving emerald eyes taht said Axel wanted to spend the rest of his days with Zexion. She sighed at the thought, maybe it was only a fairy tale after all...to be with the one you truly love.

Johnel: Yes for it isn’t a fairy tale Veronica it is a creepy person’s fan fiction. Also utilized Youtube videos are not made by me though I don't know if I need to say that.

Don't Hold Me Closer Cloaked Dancer (Part 5)

"Zexion?" Lexaeus asked.

Zexion looked at him, "Yes?" he asked, smiling lightly.

Johnel:*As Lexaeus* Do you ever feel not fresh?

"I'd like yo get to know you better," Lexaeus nodded, facing Zexion. Zexion looked at him and then down in thought. "Well...I like to dance, obviously," he laughed lightly. "and I'm really good at cooking and baking, I love it! And well...it's kind of embarrassing to say, but my life's dream is to be an actor. That's why I started working at Xemnas' place cus we have these little...acts we put on. Like once me and Demyx-"

Johnel: Whorehouse equals acting career? Why do I have a feeling this Zexion might have gotten a negative on an IQ test.

"We don't need to hear your life's story," Cloud groaned from the next seat over.

Johnel: Good to see I’m not the only one that wants this to stop.

"Don't be so rude, Cloud," Lexaeus growled lowly. Cloud stuck his tongue out and turned upside down like a bored child. He looked at Zexion and blushed slightly. He was able to see up the small opening of Zexion's shorts where a pair of pink girl's panties complete with strawberry decor were in view. He grinned like a kid in a candy shop and kept looking from behind his sunglasses.

Johnel: Cloud stop you need to be the sane one here.

Zexion shifted uncomfortably, only making Cloud's view better. The small slate haired boy felt paranoia in the air, like he was being watched by someone unwanted.

Johnel: Well no shit Sherlock.

Shrugging the thought away he looked at Lexaeus and began again. "Well...my entire life I've wanted to be an actor, and I did everything to try to pursue my dream!" he smiled softly. "But it's getting nowhere."

Johnel:*As Zexion* I mean I’ve slept with so many men at least one of them has to be a Hollywood producer whoe will see my  natural acting talent as I go down on him.

Lexaeus looked at him and his eyes grew somewhat solemn, "So you started working with that Xemnas fellow to pursue this dream?" he asked. "Because it was easy, right?"

Johnel: No because he was an idiot.

Zexion nodded, "Yeah, it was that closest thing I'd get to becoming an actor, the audience...was not what I was expecting, but it's close," he smiled.

Johnel: Yes for Youtube, street performances, acting troops, and theater in schools are non-existent in this universe apparently.

Lexaeus watched him more and was silent, he gave a soft nod and looked forward. Zexion looked up at him and did something daring; he layed his head in Lexaeus' lap and layed the rest of his body across the leather seats of the limo. He looked up at Lexaeus to see if he felt uncomfortable by this.

Johnel: Somewhat bold but at the same time would you really think a man who buys a whorehouse worker to marry him is uncomforted by anything?

The larger man smiled and began to pet Zexion's tiny head. Zexion smiled and closed his eyes, nuzzling Lexaeus' stomach.

Johnel: Okay so Zexion is now one of those little purse dogs.

Cloud was now sitting up, pouting angrily, just when he was starting to get turned on. Ah, well he thought, a malicious smile on his lips. I have my ways...

Johnel:*As Cloud* Yes I have access to the internet with plenty of legal material for sexual satisfaction and am in no way going to get my rape on.

Zexion opened his eyes and looked at Cloud. Something about the man made him uneasy...and he seemed awfully close with Lexaeus. If Cloud was /that/ rude and wasn't fired yet. Maybe they have a close bond Zexion thought. "So...do you two know each other personally?" he asked, figuring that would get his answer.

"We're cousins," Cloud smiled, "Why?"

Zexion anticipated the 'why'. "No reason, you two just seem so close," he giggled softly.

Johnel: Stop giggling it’s creeping me out. Also Cloud and Lexaeus being related is just really weird out of all the suddenly related fanfic set ups I’ve seen.

Lexaeus smiled at him then looked out the window, "We're here," he said softly, lifting Zexion up and pulling him into his lap. He lightly nibbled his ear, receiving a moan from the boy.

Johnel: Dude you are in the drive way wait a few minute before the (few hours of sex later) will you.

 "Come now," he said, helping Zexion out of the limo. "You say you want to be an actor?"

Zexion nodded, "More than anything in the entire world!"

Johnel: We know!

Lexaeus smiled, "After dinner we will meet my parents, my father is a director. I'll have him speak with you a little and then after we get married I promise you'll be an actor," he said softly, holding Zexion close to him in a hug.

Johnel: Ha ha! Contrivance.

Zexion smiled, "Really?!" he gasped happily, jumping up and down with joy.

Cloud watched from behind, watching Zexion bounce like that was...it was too much. "Excuse me Master," he bowed, leaving the room.

Johnel:*As Cloud* I have to go do non rape related things yes.

Zexion looked up at Lexaeus again, "Thank you so much!" he said softly. Axel would never have been able to do that...he knew this because Axel had told him he wasn't rich like Lexaeus.

Johnel: Somewhat shallow but what do I care.

 He said "I'm not rich with money...but I am rich with love."

Johnel: That is so corny I could have it as a side with some mashed potatoes.

 Zexion made a mistake...he laughed it off. He realized, unfortunately the next day when it was too late, that love was not something you should laugh at.

"Zexion?" Lexaeus asked. Zexion looked up and smiled, "Haha, sorry I was spacing out," he nodded.

Johnel:*As Zexion*  I think is time for a convenient time skip how about you?

It was now three weeks that Zexion had been living at the mansion and he had been thinking of Axel less and less. The mansion, as well as everyone in it.

Johnel: I feel something is missing but I can’t say what.

 He went to see everyone at the club constantly and it was a pleasant visit every time he went. Zexion was walking with Lexaeus now, they were holding hands and strolling along the hallways. Axel had creeped his way back into Zexion's thoughts, and he was just getting rid of them too...

Johnel: So now we have Axel Master of The Creep in this fic too.

Zexion, once again absorbed in his own thoughts, hadn't realized they entered a room. Lexaeus leaned down and lightly kissed Zexion. Zexion was slightly taken aback, but he returned Lexaeus' kisses.

Johnel: Yes for it is so strange to be kissed by someone who bought you specifically for marriage.

 Zexion's steps slowly led them to the bed and the smaller boy layed down, only to be pinned by the larger man.

"Wait!" Zexion yelled, trying to push Lexaeus off of him.

Johnel: *As Zexion* You aren’t my seme twu wuv!

Lexaeus sat up and looked back at him, "Zexion, what's wrong?" he asked.

Johnel: Could be he’s afraid you’ll split him in half.

Zexion ran to the bathroom and slammed the door shut. Lexaeus walked to the door worriedly.

"Z-Zexion?" he asked, knocking lightly on the door.

Johnel: Wait better idea he has a chestburster and is about to die so the fic can instead become some sort of Xenomorph versus Organization XIII battle.

Zexion was silent, only the sound of his whimpering was audible. "I-I'm just... a little sick!" he yelled to him. He absentmindedly put a hand on his stomach, "Just a little sick..." he repeated, whispering to himself now.

Johnel: Really you don’t say?